The answer to all life’s problems: Buy a juicer!

My Peer Mentor is very well intentioned. Thanks to him, I have finally discovered the ultimate cure and solution to my chronic pain and all life’s other challenges as a bipolar person with tardive dyskinesia: Buy a Juicer! Yes, folks, it’s that simple.

At a Behavioral Health Center nearby, I have a WRAP plan and goals that I discuss with my mentor. I was in a depression relapse and having problems with back pain. It’s a lovely center but after I got tardive dyskinesia and fell off of their volunteer rolls, they deemed I am no longer ‘stable’ enough to be a volunteer. This can only mean that God wants me to spend my time writing.

I’ve struggle with exercise bulimia my whole life. I’ve had more surgeries than an NFL linebacker, all in search of the body beautiful, which I thought would overcompensate for my other problems. Some mornings my back pain on a scale of 1-10 is an 8, really burning up, man. I use ice packs, Mobic, a Lidocaine patch and the occasional pain pill when life demands it. I can’t handle being all laid up. I’m only 54. But you know that these centers and mental health professionals in general think that if you have a mental illness, you should not be given controlled substances. You’ll become an addict!!! I have news for them. I already am an addict!!! That fact was established in the 80’s with cocaine. One I started I could not stop. That doesn’t mean that applies to Benzos and Pain pills. I am very conservative in my use,,and if they knew how many extras I have, it would  make them very nervous and they’d cut me off.

Well, anyway, this is not stuff I share with my Peer Mentor because he’s already trying to be subtle about his absolute anti stance on pain medicine. He must never have gone through what I go through. Of course not, he’s not exercise bulimic, isn’t a former professional athlete and a weight freak. I’m on an anti-inflammatory diet, anti-inflammatory herb and drink tons of water. My Peer mentor didn’t think I was doing the right things for my low back, which is degenerated, herniated and has an annular tear they can never repair. The edges of it hit the nerves and..

“I have a great idea,” he said, “Have you ever looked into nutrition for pain relief?” I thought I already was. “I think you should buy a juicer,” he exclaimed. Dumbfounded, I could only nod in assent. I was laughing or crying inside, not sure. Now I see the light!!!

I’m confused though. I was already eating celery, radishes, kale, carrots, beets, lettuce, arugula and cabbabe in my daily salads, with avocado and that crunchy little white root vegetable, Jicama. How would juicing make my life suddenly transform. How will all the structural problems in my spine just disappear? Is it something in the noise of the blender? Please, Please, get back to me on this. Let me know and send me the links and other info on the best juicer for bad backs!

2 thoughts on “The answer to all life’s problems: Buy a juicer!

  1. Juicing is expensive and I never heard of juicing for bad backs. Maybe if all you use is anti-inflammatory fruits and veggies. I know nothing about them. Sorry!

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