As a bourgeoning bipolar, I took stimulants to keep getting acting and modeling work..

Hairdressers who hired me to  model 4 their salon didn’t think I was thin enough. I was 5’7″ and 115. I needed 2 b thinner,they said. Here is how I stayed that way: Cocaine, legal diet pills and 7 mile runs.
This is ugly and sick. That is why this blog is hooked up to an anonymous email address not linked to my real last name. The reason I am stuck writing fiction and not just my memoirs…which my intuition tells me might be more compelling…is because my family begs for anonymity from me, even though I am invited to nothing.
 Even today, in my family of origin and in the media we are told we are not thin enough. This has really affected my mental health recovery over the past 25 years.
 In fact, use of ephedra, street stimulants and other stuff made my illness progress from bipolar 2 to bipolar 1.
Today, the insanity continues. The names change but the story is the same.
They have stimulant-based pills for a new dx called “Binge Eating Disorder” and it’s all FDA approved and legal.
Monica Seles of Tennis is the spokesperson for the product.    It’s speed, people.  And we’re encouraged to go fast.

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